Back on May 21st, I reported on the feud between Intel and MIT’s One Laptop Per Child program. It was a nasty affair, with all sorts of name-calling and angry dismissals.

Happily, the Associated Press is now reporting Intel and MIT have not only settled their differences, they’ve actually decided to partner up. Intel will join the OLPC board and contribute funding to the project.

As I mentioned in my last post on this topic, technology is only one tool in closing the ‘digital divide’ and encouraging development in Africa, Asia and other emerging regions. But at least now, people from these areas can access an innovative, low-cost computer without a lot of corporate cat-fighting getting in the way.

A Chicago jury unanimously found Conrad Black, Lord of Crossharbour, guilty of mail fraud and obstruction of justice. The last charge carries a maximum sentence of 20 years in prison. This means ol’ Conrad will almost certainly receive a jail sentence. After 20 years of appeals, of course.

Take note, you who think your wealth puts you above the law. Arrogance will not protect you.

Now, we need to figure out how to put Barbara Amiel, human wasteland par excellance, on the moon.

UPDATE: The UK Conservative Party will no longer allow Black to sit as a Tory in the House of Lords. Guess you shouldn’t have pooched your Canadian citizenship, eh Conrad?

Hopes that Gordon Brown might take a harder line with the Americans than Tony “Yankee Doodle” Blair took another hit today. In advance of his first visit to the USA as PM, Brown indicated his desire to continue his predecessor’s  close relationship. Said Brown:

“We will not allow people to separate us from the United States of America in dealing with the common challenges that we face around the world. I will continue to work, as Tony Blair did, very closely with the American administration.”

Brown’s comments came after a Washington speech by Douglas Alexander, the UK’s Trade and Development Secretary. The speech was seen by many observers as signalling a sea-change in US/UK relations.

Here’s what he said:

“In the 20th century, a country’s might was too often measured in what they could destroy. In the 21st century, strength should be measured by what we can build together. And so we must form new alliances based on common values, ones not just to protect us from the world, but ones which reach out to the world. We need to demonstrate by our deeds, words and our actions that we are internationalist, not isolationist, multilateralist, not unilateralist, active and not passive, and driven by core values, consistently applied, not special interests.”

It’s a sad commentary on the state of foreign policy in the United States when the values implied by Alexander’s speech- principled, internationalist and moral behaviour- is perceived as an attack on the USA. What? Building and not destroying? My God. The UK has gone mad.

Hopefully, Brown can take his Minister’s words to heart.

The Iraqi city of Basra is currently experiencing a badger plague. Add that to the list of reasons why it generally sucks to live in Basra.

Locals believe the badgers, who have allegedly attacked at least one person, were released by the British Military. Why the UK would do this is unclear, although motive or logic is never a strong component of a conspiracy theory.

For their part, the UK stridently denies the claims. Said Major Mike Shearer:

 ”We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.”

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who said anything about man-eating badgers? Is it possible the British Army is now using weaponized vegetarian badgers to harass insurgents? The implications are chilling.

Anyways, local experts have identified the creatures as ‘Al-Girta’, or a honey badger. According to Mushtaq Abdul-Mahdi, director of Basra’s veterinary hospital, the creatures have been in Iraq for decades. Said Abdul-Mahdi:

“These appeared before the fall of the regime in 1986. Talk that this animal was brought by the British forces is incorrect and unscientific.”

Indeed. But I’d sure me miffed that in addition to airstrikes and car bombs, I now had to watch out for a 30lb carnivore trying to eat my face. Truly, a land of woe. 

I just hope they don’t notice all the beavers I released in Basra’s lumber district.

What do you call a policy that achieves the exact opposite of its stated goals? A neo-conservative policy! The Bushies should have called it “The War on Hussein”. Then they could claim some sort of victory.

A new report out today claims that Al Qaeda is stronger than ever despite six years of conflict ostensibly aimed at wiping it out. Good going, guys. Popsicles all around.

The report, titled Al-Qaeda Better Positioned to Strike the West concludes that, well, Al-Qaeda is in a better position to attack the West than in 2001. Said CIA deputy director of intelligence, John Kringen:

“We see more training. We see more money. We see more communications. We see that activity rising.”

So in other words, the War on Terror is a categorical failure. Oh, wait. It has been staggeringly effective in killing US troops and Iraqi civilians. So it has that going for it.

This is what happens when you put yourself at the mercy of imbeciles.

That’s what officials at Ford are predicting, anyway. The new cars will use internal combustion hydrogen engines- not as clean as pure fuel cell cars, but much cheaper to develop and build. Said spokesman John Laptez.

“The technology is there at a sufficient level, in the three-to-five-year window, if all things were perfect, we could reasonably think this is a solution we could draw on. We’re not really talking about invention, that’s the thing. We know how to manufacture this kind of technology in high volumes.”

But the ‘all things perfect’ requirement is a bit tricky- to make a run at the hydrogen market, fuel storage limitations must be solved, public fear of hydrogen allayed, filling stations set up, and gas prices must remain high.

Hydrogen combustion vehicles still produce minute amounts of harmful emissions, but drastically less than a gasoline vehicle. But the biggest benefit to hydrogen combustion is its cost and availability. They can therefore help to bridge the gap between fossil fuels and the holy grail of enviro transportation, the hydrogen fuel cell.

In related news, I’m pleased to report my car that runs totally on broken Conservative Party promises is performing better than expected.

Ah, the goofy exuberance of the human spirit.

From time immemorial, man has dreamed of flight. And then we totally figured it out, and were all sorted. But that didn’t stop Kent Couch, a man lacking any pilot training, an aeronautics education, or the normal fear of death, from strapping 105 large helium balloons to a lawn chair and taking to the skys. Nine hours and 310 km later, he touched down. Said Couch:

“When you’re a little kid and you’re holding a helium balloon, it has to cross your mind. When you’re lying in the grass on a summer day, and you see the clouds, you wish you could jump on them. This is as close as you can come to jumping on them. It’s just like that.”

Moments after landing, a strong gust of wind blew away his chair and video recorder. If you happen to find it in your yard, please contact Mr. Couch directly.

While Couch enjoyed his flight, he is somewhat baffled that he managed to lose his own luggage. Apparently, this is some sort of universal constant in air travel.