I’m a bit of a bike guy. Or more accurately, a total bike nerd. So, I’m predisposed to things that involve bicycles, mention bicycles, or even sound like they might concern bicycles in some way. Take the popular contraceptive “tri-cyclen”. It’s not a product I use, but I’m still a big fan for its subtle incorporation of the word “cycle”.
Of course, every obsession has its limits. Today, I found mine: Bike Polo. Like the name suggests, competitors ride around on fixed-gear bikes with polo mallets and attempt to knock a small ball into a goal. And, because it combines any number of fringe, exclusive activities (fixies, obscure sports, borderline illegal use of urban space and stupid outfits), it is also a perfect storm of hipsterism:
BIKE POLO TOURNAMENT – CPCV09 from Androsky Knauer on Vimeo.
Oh, it’s all there. Ironic facial hair. The hint of drug abuse. Wan-looking, bored women hanging around for some reason. Completely unnecessary nudity. Basically, this is a sport played by extremely unpleasant people for the sole benefit of other extremely unpleasant people. It’s a form of organized douchebaggery, and I object.
Which is too bad, really. Bike Polo requires a lot of riding skill, and for all their posturing, these guys can handle their bikes. We can only hope that Bike Polo increases in popularity to the point that the truly virulent hipsters lose interest and normal bike enthusiasts can play without fear of undeserved derision. And the hiptards can move onto something even more obscure, like “Unicycle Rugby” or “Tricycle Fishing”.
I have a bike question, most benevolent bike nerd!
I want to get a bike, but I haven’t had one in…15 years?
All I want it for is for afternoon rides through the Don Valley.
I am also mostly broke!
What is the least amount of money you would recommend paying for a bike, helmet and lock? Am I missing anything else that I should be buying?
Most people don’t use fixed gear for hardcourt bike polo.
Calling Paris out for being trendy and douchebaggy is like shooting fish in a barrel. Look at North American hardcourt bike polo for a less nude picture of the sport.
I play bike polo, in Victoria,BC. If you want to give it a try before critiquing it, maybe you should contact someone in Ottawa or “The centre of the universe” aka Toronto.
I think that you will find that it is nothing like you imagine. Fun, Skill and Drinking. I ride a freewheel 32, 16. Most of my friends ride commuting bikes.
I stand corrected.
But you’ve got to admit, that video is suuuuper annoying.
Karen, I’d say you’d be looking to spend between $400 and $500 for a quality bike that will last a while, plus helmet and lock. That’s about all you need.
I tend to recommend Trek bikes to people looking for a lower cost, good quality ride. Like this one:
http://www.trekbikes.com/women/wsd_products/bikes/bike_path/7000wsd/
You can find Treks at most good bike shops…but there’s an actual Trek Store in TO:
http://trektoronto.ca/
good shot. bike polo is an extreme sport that requires talent and more than just a trendy bike and the rest of the hipster attire. look more into it and check out more of the diversity. and you might change your mind. but if not, you LOSE to the greatest bicycle team sport.
Thanks so much, Graeme!
“For all their posturing…”? Seems like the only one posturing here is you!
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