Roy Pearson, a United States Judge, is suing a family-owned drycleaning business for $54 million- all over a lost pair of pants. Jin Chung, Soo Chung and Ki Chung, owners of Washington-based Custom Cleaners, allegedly lost a pair of Maroon and Blue suit pants, and then refused to replace them. Mr. Pearson became so upset when recounting the story of his lost pants yesterday that he began to cry and had to be excused from the courtroom.
Defense lawyers claim the lawsuit is the result of a bitter man in financial difficulty after a recent divorce. Mr. Pearson may also be bat-shazbot crazy.
Everyone knows dry cleaners are terrible. I've had shirts ruined, buttons crushed and inexplicable stains added to pants. But because the technology behind dry cleaning is apparently based on some sort of magic unavailable to the common man, I must continue to use their services.
The sad thing about all of this is that while the lawsuit is clearly ridiculous, it has forced the Chungs to shell out thousands in legal fees, jeopardizing their business. I suspect Mr. Pearson, no stranger to the law, is using this action to drive the Chungs into the ground.
Nevertheless, I will be watching the outcome of this case with great interest. If Pearson wins, I will be lauching my own multi-million dollar pant suit (didn't Cher have one of those?). I also plan on suing that shifty guy in the cafeteria who keeps looking at me cock-eyed.