Return of the Rhino Party

The Rhinocerous Party of Canada has announced it will run a candidate in the Sept. 17 federal byelection in Montreal's Outremont riding, ending a 17 year absence from the national political stage. The Rhino president, who has recently changed his name from Brian (Godzilla) Salmi to Satan, made the announcement on Tuesday. The party is also launching a $50 million lawsuit against the Government of Canada over a 1993 election law that stripped the Rhinoes of their registered party status. The law, overturned in 2004, required a political party to run in at least 50 ridings to be officially registered and thereby be able to distribute tax receipts to supporters. The lawsuit is officially recorded as Satan v. Her Majesty The Queen.   

The return of the Rhinoes is to be applauded, mostly because of their visionary political platform. Important reforms include repealing the law of gravity, changing Canada's name to Nantucket, and providing greater access to higher education by building taller schools. 

Genius.