I'm a bit of a bike guy. Or more accurately, a total bike nerd. So, I'm predisposed to things that involve bicycles, mention bicycles, or even sound like they might concern bicycles in some way. Take the popular contraceptive "tri-cyclen". It's not a product I use, but I'm still a big fan for its subtle incorporation of the word "cycle". Of course, every obsession has its limits. Today, I found mine: Bike Polo. Like the name suggests, competitors ride around on fixed-gear bikes with polo mallets and attempt to knock a small ball into a goal. And, because it combines any number of fringe, exclusive activities (fixies, obscure sports, borderline illegal use of urban space and stupid outfits), it is also a perfect storm of hipsterism:
Oh, it's all there. Ironic facial hair. The hint of drug abuse. Wan-looking, bored women hanging around for some reason. Completely unnecessary nudity. Basically, this is a sport played by extremely unpleasant people for the sole benefit of other extremely unpleasant people. It's a form of organized douchebaggery, and I object.
Which is too bad, really. Bike Polo requires a lot of riding skill, and for all their posturing, these guys can handle their bikes. We can only hope that Bike Polo increases in popularity to the point that the truly virulent hipsters lose interest and normal bike enthusiasts can play without fear of undeserved derision. And the hiptards can move onto something even more obscure, like "Unicycle Rugby" or "Tricycle Fishing".